i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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