My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize