i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
