Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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