Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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