I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
