btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
so let's talk penis.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.