Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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