I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize