hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
