Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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