I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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