My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize
