laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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