I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
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