so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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