im six kinds of drunk right now
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
