I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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