brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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