My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He felt like a one man threesome
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
A+ Viking dick
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
