Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
