If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
