Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
COCAINE IS GR8
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