He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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