we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
