Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
