This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
