my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
is this the sara with the beer cane?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
