Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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