Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
