he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
