Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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