Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
