Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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