Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
