Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
