I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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