we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
No subtext here. People are naked.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
