I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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