We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
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Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
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You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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