I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
