i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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