he wants to bone in the snuggie
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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