I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
