He had one of those small greek statue penises
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
