I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
i believe in u and ur pee
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
