If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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