Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
