i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
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I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
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Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I enjoy the company of your penis
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