I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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