I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
