My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
